But I Don't

Paula's Poems

But I Don't

by Paula Puddephatt

I fear abandonment

So much that I can’t function

I want to believe

That anyone could like me

But I don’t

My heart won’t

I fear abandonment

So much that I can’t function




		Home \| Dreams Instead \| Twisted Illusions \| Suicide Angel \| Delusions So Beautiful \| Helpless \| Too Attached \| High on Life \| Something's Not Right \| Distraction \| Lifestyle Choice \| See Me Through \| And The Cycle Repeats \| Worthless \| No Reverse \| Barbed Wire \| Love Wasted \| Obsession's Dance \| Where are You? \| Three Years \| Eternal \| Conclusion \| Confused and Broken \| Moving On \| Final Spin \| Attachment and Obsession \| Bluebells for Eternal Friendship \| Spirit's Song \| My Cousin Rachel \| La Mouette \| Mary and the Horse Thief \| From the East Wing \| Persephone \| Disordered Mind \| Girl in Pink \| Tenderness and Lace \| No Rhythm, Reason or Rhyme \| The Legend of Lucy Lightfoot \| Only The Horse \| Harsh Lessons \| Time \| Display \| Space of a Year \| For Other Survivors \| Dreams and Illusions \| Space and Away \| Autumn Days \| Inside My Mind \| In Every Breeze \| Almost Wondering Why \| Scarlet \| Sepia \| 2012: End of the World? \| The Truth From The Lies \| Carousel \| The "Own Life" Exclusion Clause \| Never Was Enough \| All Over Again \| Colours of Pain \| Distant \| So Quietly \| Before I \| One Flower \| Liquid Gold \| My Words \| Analysis \| Consequences \| Dreaming in Neon \| Psychedelic Skies \| Dreams \| Magnolia \| Self-Harm \| Revealed \| Trust \| If I Believe \| Moonlit Emotions \| Selective Caring \| Moments \| Plan B \| Reasons, Seasons and Private People \| Even Now \| Words Like \| Can't Not \| New Start \| Pure \| Not Mine \| Disappointing Daughter \| Numbers \| Not Spring For Me \| You Both \| Retreat \| Given Choice \| Relentless \| Sunlight \| Artificial \| Memories \| Night Poems \| The Quiet Ones \| No-one Hears \| All Night \| Spiral Staircase in Sepia \| Non-directional Days \| Trying to Escape \| Calm \| Empty Cradles \| Silver \| The Healing Process \| Twigs and Leaves \| Late Autumn Into Winter \| On The Inside, Looking Out \| Disappointment \| And Now \| Star \| For Rhiannon \| Maybe Baby Pink \| Potential \| Metaphorically \| Bell Jars, Sylvia, Ariadne and Me \| Walls \| So Much Better When \| Sometimes You're Everywhere \| Never Pain \| Converting Each Hurt \| Fade Into \| Speak My Mind \| Ebony and Blue \| Neon and Rainbows \| Oak Tree \| Dark Days \| And That Is All \| Almost Safe \| So Scared \| Parallel Paths \| Tesco Clubcard \| What They Don't See \| Pastel Shades \| Imperfect Expressions \| Every Day \| Your Words \| Beyond \| A Reason \| But I Don't \| That You'll Reject Me \| Descending Chords \| Feels Like The End \| Can't Mention \| Learning to Fake It \| Tell Me Why \| The Right Words \| Darkened Room \| Obsession \| Why Can't We? \| Beyond "friendsreunited" \| Underneath Her Mask \| Delusions \| Fragile Beauty \| Not All About \| Enough \| Jaded \| Black-and-white (with a golden beak) \| Magic Beans and Mindless Office Work \| Resigned \| To Pay the Rent \| Autumn \| The Kids and Pets Thing \| Who is "Everybody", Anyway? \| Employment Options: Horses For Courses \| Sample Kyrielle \| Alternative CV \| Spiritual Peace \| Not in God's Name \| The Highest Perch \| Quakers on Pacifism \| Knock, Knock \| Cash Machines in Walls \| Depression \| If You Know These Things \| Quaker Plain \| Shades of Grey \| Sellotape and Glue \| Devotion \| Spirit of the Unicorn \| Moonlight Reflected \| Insomnia \| No Chance \| 1993 \| Remembering \| Games \| A Piece of my Peace of Mind \| Lime Trees \| Yew Trees \| Feeding the Ducks \| Duck Haiku \| Dolphins \| Transcending \| Perspective \| A Certain Stillness \| Toco Toucan \| Red Roses \| Purple Velvet \| Links